My Maternity Jeans

I mentioned in the birth story that I gained all of 4 1/2 pounds during my pregnancy with C, four of it in that last month. I wore regular old jeans into the hospital when I was in labor. I didn't show until into my seventh month with my first child, so this was not unusual for me. I was just over five months pregnant when I gave birth and I had not worn one single article of maternity clothing.

So why do I say that maternity jeans are a tool I could not live without?

Because after my extremely painful (but successful!) C-section, they were all I could stand to wear. My tummy may have been flat, but it was tender and raw and extremely sore. I ended up wearing them almost every day through my two months of recovery... almost the exact length of time I was able to wear them during my first pregnancy.

My opinion? Maternity jeans are wonderful things. They're so well-designed anymore, with fashion-forward denim colors and cuts. With a cute top, who knows?

Do what you gotta do, my friend. Maternity jeans can be your best friend.

For more great tools that make lives easier, check out Toolin' Up Tuesday, hosted at Life as Mom.

Fueling up for pumping...

Since I'm right in the middle of a pumping series this week, I thought for this week's Kitchen Tip, I'd offer some advice on fueling your body for pumping success.

Much like in pregnancy, it's important that you get a well-balanced, nutritious diet when you're pumping for your infant. What may come as a surprise is that you actually need MORE calories to support your body's production of milk than you did during the pregnancy: 500 vs. 300 (assuming singleton in both cases).

Lots of fruits and veggies are critical to good health but, honestly, at the end of the day what's going to keep you energized is a balanced combination of whole grains and proteins. And never, ever forget to stay hydrated!

Here is one of my very favorite "nursing breakfasts":

• Whole wheat English muffin with peanut butter
• Strawberry yogurt (this happens, conveniently, to be YoMommy, but any yogurt will do...)
• Plenty of water

The name of the game? Quick, nutrient packed energy sources that will provide the fuel your body needs to make the ideal fuel for your baby!

For more great food related tips, check out Tammy's Recipes!

"My story Monday..." The Here and Now Edition

I realized that I've thrown out quite a few little facts about my daughter here and there throughout this blog, but I thought it might be fun to briefly outline where she's at and who she is today. This is especially fun to do since I so recently posted her birth story.

• C. is about 2 1/2 right now. She'll be 3 on Christmas Eve.
• She requires no supplemental oxygen and hasn't since June of 2006.
• She has not been on any ongoing prescription meds since her release from the hospital.
• She eats anything and everything, and all of it by mouth.
  
• She can say her ABC's, make animal noises, and say several simple words.
• She can run, jump, climb, and dance.
• She attends a preschool program two days a week in a "typical education" setting.
• She wears glasses; she is extremely near-sighted.
• She is feisty and tempermental and prone to dramatic tantrums.
• She weighs 25 lb fully dressed to shoes.
• She is Daddy's Girl. I can't even compare... (though I do throw pretty awesome tea parties...)
  

The range of outcomes for micro-preemies is vast. We have been very fortunate I think it goes without saying. But I believe it's exciting to see where they can go... how they can develop. C. currently sees an occupational therapist and a speech therapist each once a week. She may need a little extra help "catching up" for some time.

Does that make her any less incredible?

Not a chance.

Help me out: Seeking pumping tips!

As you may know, I'm doing a pumping series this week because it is something I feel strongly about. I also think that pumping mamas need all the support they can get!

I already talked about making the decision to start pumping. Tomorrow, I'll be writing about "keeping it up".

I consider myself a pumping success story and I have some of my own advice to offer, but I know there are those of you out there who pumped far longer than I did and who overcame supply challenges.

What are your best tips?
What encouragement can you offer moms who are having a hard time pumping more than a tiny bit?
How did you stay committed to the process?

Leave your best practices in the comments section or email me at:
micropreemies (at) yahoo (dot) com

Thanks!

Deciding to Pump

Here's where I give you the whole story...

My son was formula fed. Exclusively. I did not even attempt to breastfeed. I literally lost sleep and had nightmares during my pregnancy. A family history of challenges and intense modesty issues eventually forced me to just say, "You know what? My baby is going to be formula-fed. And that's that."

I don't want to get into a debate about "what's better" or "who's a better mommy" or any of that. I just want you all to know where I started at with this feeding debate. My son thrived. He was healthy and hearty and not prone to ear infections or viruses or anything else. Daddy happily took on the 2 am feedings and I was happy to let him. I was truly content with my choice.

And when I was pregnant with #2? Fully intended to formula feed again. Never even entertained the idea of breastfeeding.

Fast forward to when I was 23 weeks pregnant and in labor. All of a sudden, I was faced with the knowledge that my baby may very well be born before the third trimester even began. My baby wouldn't get any of those wonderful antibodies that pass through the placenta during those final weeks of pregnancy. My baby would get absolutely no antibodies whatsoever from me... unless I chose to breastfeed.

Panicked, I asked the nurse, "Can I change the paperwork???? When I checked in, I said I wanted bottles, but I don't! I want to try to breastfeed! Can I??"

"No problem."

Well, when C. arrived at just barely 24 weeks, it became clear that she would not be nursing. But that didn't mean I couldn't pass on nutrients and antibodies. It just meant I had to pump.

Did you know that women's bodies still produce milk shortly after delivery with preemies just like full-term babies? Did you know that our bodies are so incredibly amazing that the milk preemie moms produce is different from that produced by moms who give birth at term? Incredible.

Deciding how to feed your baby is a very important decision. It is also an intensely personal decision. If, like me, you do decide to provide breast milk for your preemie, stick around. Tomorrow I'll be addressing some tips for keeping up your supply and some "best practices" for successful pumping.

You can read more about the importance of a hospital grade breast pump here.

You can find some great reader tips for storing expressed breast milk here.

You're Going Home!!!!... or maybe not.

There are few words you look forward to hearing quite as much as "You're going home" when you've been stationed in the NICU for months. I can tell you exactly where I was standing and exactly which neonatologist first uttered those words to me. It was the beginning of March 2006 and, truly, we hadn't expected to even consider going home for another month when we'd be approaching C's original due date. You could have knocked me over with a feather.

We were (tentatively) excited, but also pretty skeptical. We scheduled a meeting with the social worker and the head of neonatology to discuss the reality of this happening. Dr. L. felt that it was perfectly realistic to figure on going home within two weeks. Two weeks! We were thrilled.

Fast forward two weeks. C. had already had two laser eye surgeries to try to correct some early ROP (Retinopathy of Prematurity). Basically, her blood vessels were growing and branching too much and this can cause the retina to detach if left untreated. Laser surgery is usually all that is needed. When I received a call on my cell directly from the head opthalmologist, I knew it wasn't good news. Her eyes had gotten worse and she needed retinal surgery. Despite being in one of the top 3 NICU's in the country, she would have to be transported. You see, there are only three surgeons in the country who perform retinal surgeries on infants so small.

We left for Chicago the very next day. We spent three days there. When she was to be transferred back, we learned she wasn't "sick" enough for the NICU we had been at. She was transferred to a Special Care Nursery at a neighboring hospital. All our former plans for a "going-home-timeline" had to change.

And that happens. Often. It happened to other families too. You think you know when the big day will come, but then- nope- doesn't happen. Sometimes it is because your child develops a new illness or symptom and needs further treatment. Sometimes it's because your baby doesn't pass one of numerous tests required to leave the hospital. Sometimes it's because noone checks to make sure the equipment is actually recording during the test (ask me about that one...). It is frustrating, nail-biting, at times infuriating, but it's just another bump in the road. Months from now it won't really matter if you were released on April 5th or April 10th... but at the time, that's hard to take.

It's important if you're someone other than the parent that you be supportive, but don't go overboard. Let the parents share their enthusiasm, but don't go scheduling major celebrations just yet. Let them vent if (when) plans change.

When the big day DOES arrive, it's an amazing thing. Having your child safely tucked in the car seat in your vehicle is a joyful feeling. You are going home. Home! What could possibly go wrong now?

You could go back. And that happens too. We were very lucky to bring our daughter home in the Spring and have everything go smoothly and well. She did not need to be re-hospitalized after her release.

But some babies do. Sometimes repeatedly. And this creates a never-ending cycle of worry and waiting for the parents as they wonder when- WHEN- they will be able to just settle in and relax. To know they can just adjust to life at home with their precious child.

As the friend or family-member of someone caught in this revolving door, it can be difficult to know what to do, what to say. It's important to recognize that bringing a preemie home is not the same as bringing a full-term baby home. Preemie parents can't be quite so confident that they'll be able to stay there. As the loved one, by all means, be excited for them! Allow them to bask in the joy of having their newborn home. But don't be shocked or alarmed if the baby needs to be re-admitted. Don't make the parents go through the whole saga. Don't approach them with a dramatic, "Oh my gosh, what HAPPENED???"

Just be there. Like I advised earlier on, ask if there's anything you can do, anyone you can call. Tell them you'll be praying for their child.

Parenting a preemie is a roller coaster ride... and sometimes that ride doesn't end when the discharge papers are signed. But once you've ridden that ride, you learn better than most how to enjoy and cherish the simple calm. And that is a wondrous lesson.

A Unity in Faith

One of the most beautiful memories I have of our NICU experience has to do with our faith. And the faith of the families around us.

On more than one occasion, we would all grow silent as we listened to a gentle Mennonite man play the flute for his tiny infant daughter. There was something haunting about the lovely tunes he would produce at her bedside.

Late in the evenings, I adored hearing the father of another micropreemie sit by his daughter's isolette and play her songs of worship from his Baptist church. His soft strumming on the guitar comforted me in ways that words did not.

And I also frequently attracted a small audience as I sang hymns from my Catholic upbringing to my itty-bitty little C. I learned later on that when we were in "isolation", the nurses would turn the speaker on so others could hear my voice...

We didn't really "talk religion" while we visited our babies. We each just did our own thing. But there was so much community and so much appreciation and, well, so much belief in the room. We fed off of each other's unwavering faith.

That unity in faith... it's a beautiful thing.