Giving Back to Those Who Saved Your Baby, Part 3

We've been addressing ways to give back to the people who played such an important role in helping our children survive. On Friday, the topic was giving back through Time. Yesterday, I offered some suggestions of ways you can use your Talent to give back. For today's final segment of this series, I want to talk about ways to give back through Treasure.

Without a doubt, this is the simplest of the three. Provided you have the resources. The simple answer to "How do I give back?" is "Write a check."

And that's not bad advice. Knowing that most of us are not in a position to, say, fund a new wing at the children's hospital, here is a list of ideas of ways to give back (monetarily) at a variety of dollar levels:

• Make a donation earmarked for the NICU at your hospital.
• Donate to a smaller group that works intimately with the NICU; e.g. at our hospital, there is a group known as the Cheer Guild that provides toys, books, etc. to sick children.
• Create a scholarship fund for a student going into nursing or pre-med.
• Consider making a donation to a community like CaringBridge , an online service that enables parents of critically ill children to journal their stories and share pictures.
• Start a "White Envelope" tradition with your family at Christmas- in lieu of (at least some) gifts, take on a project and donation as a family.
• Think about other foundations that helped- maybe you stayed at a Ronald McDonald House. These places rely on donations big and small to operate.
• Coordinate a fund-raiser at work, school, or with a scout troop.
• Hold a bake sale or help your children set up a lemonade stand to raise funds.
• Contribute an unexpected (and thus, hopefully, unbudgeted) holiday bonus to a hospital or cause.

Keep in mind that many donations are tax-deductible. Also remember that if everyone who only had five dollars actually gave it instead of saying "Why bother?", as a group we could raise a whole lot. A drop in the bucket still helps fill it!

I hope those of you who were looking for ideas were perhaps able to find one or two of use over the past few days. I would love to hear what other ideas the rest of you have for great ways to give back to those amazing men and women who helped to save our children!

Giving Back to Those Who Saved Your Baby, Part 2

On Friday, I wrote a bit about ways to give back to the medical community that cared for your preemie through the use of Your Time. Today, I'd like to continue talking about ways we can give back with a focus on Talent.

The very first thing you need to do here is simply think of what you love to do. What you enjoy doing in your free time. Do you cook? Do you sew? Can you knit? Do you play an instrument? Can you sing? Are you crafty? Are you great at finding a deal? Seriously, just think about what you like to do with your time. The best way to ensure you "stick with it" when it comes to giving back with your talent is to do something that really, truly brings you joy.

Here are a few suggestions for things you can do with Your Talent:

1. Whip up a snack/appetizer tray for the nurses' break room- NICU nurses (well, probably all nurses for that matter) work very hard for very long stretches. Having some yummy treats that are quick and easy to grab will be appreciated. Whether you're a talented baker or the queen (or king) of hors d'ouevres, trays make for a pretty presentation and easy delivery.
   
2. Knit or crochet preemie hats- Patterns for these abound. Quick rule of thumb: hats for full-term newborns should fit a grapefruit, hats for 28-36 week preemies should fit an orange, and hats for micro-preemies should fit a lemon. When I crochet micro-preemie hats, I use a pattern designed for a "preemie hat" with a smaller gauge hook. This results in a slightly smaller hat. I was frustrated by how giant even the "preemie hats" were on my daughter, so it's a real mission of mine to keep our NICU stocked with teeny tiny hats!
   
3. Sew positioning "snakes" or padded wraps- These padded or foam tubes covered in soft fabric are invaluable for keeping little preemies properly positioned in their isolettes. I have never attempted to make one of these myself, but I received an email from someone who has! Anyone know where to find a good pattern?
   
4. Sew preemie gowns- When your preemie gets to start wearing clothes, it's a big milestone. We were able to dress our daughter earlier than many others because my mother and her friend made pretty little gowns for C. They were open all down the back and had two ties. Essentially, they were hospital gowns made of pretty fabrics. They allowed easy access for IV's, tubes, central lines, leads, and all the other lovely wires and things still hanging off our baby. We were able to donate a pile of extra gowns our daughter never wore.
   
5. Partner with another family or two and deliver an entire meal to the NICU team- Get together with another family of "NICU graduates" and prepare a hot meal from salad to dessert. Deliver it along with paper plates, utensils, and napkins as a "thank you" to the team that did so much for your child.
   
6. Embellish scrap book pages so that all the parents need to do is add photos and a brief write-up- Parents with babies in the NICU often either forget to document these early days or simply don't have the time or energy to compile a pretty scrapbook page. That doesn't mean they wouldn't love to preserve these memories though! Sometimes nurses put together scrapbook pages which I feel is a tremendous gift. Make their jobs a bit easier by embellishing some pages and matting spots for pictures and anecdotes. Consider making pages for babies of the opposite gender of your own. I know that when I had my son, I felt like I had a plethora of "girly" stickers and papers rolling around. And, well, sometimes it's fun to play with "blue" or "pink" when you're so used to the other!
   
7. Volunteer for holiday choir/music opportunities- Many hospitals seek talent around the holidays to sing or play carols for those confined to their hospital beds over Christmas. I was asked to be a part of this last year and was unfortunately out of the state at the time. (It was a well-known fact that I sang since I often ended up serenading the entire module!) You can bet I'll be making inquiries to see if they want me this year!
   
8. Deliver "Dad Meals" to the Family Lounge- Poor dads. They're often over-looked. Our hospital was amazing in that they would deliver up to three meals a day to nursing mothers. They also provided "discount breakfast vouchers" for fathers. That was very nice. I think it would be a very thoughtful gesture to put together some "brown bag dinners" and deliver them to the Family Lounge so the dads could eat with their wives and not have to shell out a dime.
   
9. Offer to help do on-line research to find needed items- There was a volunteer named Harry who you could almost always find sitting at a desk at the end of the NICU hall. I still see him when I go back to visit. That man is incredible. One of the sweetest things he would offer to do was to help with "computer stuff". If you were trying to set up a web page for your baby, he was your man. If you were desperately seeking the best price on a particular car seat, he was to go-to guy. You can do these things too! Volunteer to research deals and specs for items that NICU parents are seeking. Do some of the up-front work for them so all they need to do is place an order or pick it up.
   
10. Make "going home" baskets- Use baskets you have laying around or pick some up for cheap at the thrift store. Fill them with those items you couldn't live without. Consider including a split of champagne or sparkling cider so they can toast this achievement. See if one of the nurses will provide you with the brand of pacifier they're used to. Perhaps you could add some food items similar to those listed here for quick energy as the new parents get settled back at home. Laminate a card with important phone numbers (O2 provider, direct NICU number, poison control, etc.) and glue a magnet on the back. Tuck that in there too. Try to remember the things that made your life easier! You can make these as large or small as you want. This could be a great project for a church group, a classroom, or a scout troop.

Giving back should be a joyful experience. Go with what you love! What other great ways can we share our talent as a way of thanking those who saved your baby?

Join me tomorrow when I address the final part of this series- giving back with Treasure.

Giving Back to Those Who Saved Your Baby, part 1

Here's what I'm hearing from a lot of you-

• You're home (Hooray!)
• Your baby is stable and doing well (Yahoo!)
• You're starting to feel like maybe, finally, you can handle doing a little more than just surviving (Yippee!)

And so, this is the question that seems to always come to mind...

"How do I give back? How do I repay the NICU that saved my baby? What can I do to help now that I'm home?"

Fantastic questions. And common ones given the number of email requests I've received to cover the topic! I'm delighted to tackle the subject and, to be honest, even more delighted to see just how many people want to give back because of the deep gratitude they feel.

I'll be addressing "Giving Back" in three parts because, well, when I started outlining it, it was just too vast and lengthy for one post. You guy are parents- you don't have time to read page upon page of my ideas. For simplicity's sake, I've split it into Time, Talent, and Treasure. For this first part, I'll be addressing ways to give back with your Time.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

Ways to Give Back With Your Time

1. Offer to speak on behalf of the hospital- Hospitals need to advertise. They are businesses, after all. And one of the best ways they can show their strengths is through success stories like yours. Offer to speak at fundraiser dinners. Offer to do radio or TV spots. Be willing to speak for local groups and charities who might be collecting for the hospital as well. Admittedly, I'm a very comfortable public speaker. I just don't possess that "nervous gene". My husband is not like me at all in this respect. So, when it came time to tape the radio spot or speak before a Kiwanis meeting, I'm the one who did the talking. Capitalize on your strengths. You can see a little of what we taped for Riley Hospital over on the right side-bar.
   
2. Offer to be "buddied up" with a new NICU parent- Let the NICU staff know that you'd be willing to be a resource for a new parent whose baby is in a similar position to where yours was. It can be invaluable to feel like there's someone who really, truly "gets" it. You can be that person. You will be able to fill a role that friends and family, much as they try, just can't.
   
3. Volunteer to sit with older siblings- If your NICU baby was your first or only, this may never have crossed your mind. If you had older children, chances are you would have given your right arm for this kind of help. Parents with one child in the NICU and another at home feel torn. They simply can't be both places at once. Volunteer to spend an hour or so in the waiting room or lounge reading to or coloring with the older siblings of NICU babies. This frees the parent up to visit his or her child and keeps the older child close by too.
   
4. Educate those around you- One of the most important things you can do is simply spread the word about prematurity. Let people know why it happens, what it's like, how we all can help. I found that most people were staggered to even learn that a baby born at less than 24 weeks could survive, much less lead a quality life.
   
5. Participate in events benefiting the March of Dimes- The March of Dimes contributes so much to researching ways to improve the prematurity statistics in this country. They are instrumental in education and innovative research. Their annual March for Babies is a wonderful way to raise awareness and raise funds for a fabulous cause.
   
6. Write a thank you note- Doesn't that sound too easy? I remember seeing some of the most beautiful notes posted up by the nurses' station in our NICU from grateful parents just like you. I would sometimes see the nurses re-reading them with soft smiles on their faces. You know how good you feel when someone acknowledges that you did a great job? Share that feeling with the nurses and doctors who saved your baby.
   
7. Attend functions/reunions- Show your support for the facility that treated your child by attending any events they may put on. This gives you a chance to re-connect with medical staff and families you met during your NICU stay and also to meet new people who've faced similar journies. Such was the case for us when I finally got to meet fellow blogger and micropreemie mom, Ryann, at the NICU Reunion a few weeks back!
   
8. Visit the people who treated your child- One of the greatest ways you can show your thanks is by going back to visit. Let the nurses and doctors who treated your child see how big he or she has gotten. Show off new talents and share success stories. Let these amazing angels of the medical community know that their efforts are not in vain! One of the most precious moments for me was when one of our dearest NICU nurses called a couple weeks ago to see how we all were doing. C. was able to say "hi" to her on the phone. I could hear the thick emotion in our nurse's voice and I had to struggle not to burst into tears myself. What an amazing change from the not-yet-two-pounder she used to monitor and care for...

Monday, I'll be back with ways to Give Back using your talents. But for now, pick one or two or six of those ways to share your time and you are well on your way to making your gratitude very apparent. Bless all of you who asked me to write this post; it's been a wonderful way for me to reflect on more things I can do too!

American Children's Photography Charity Guild

When your child is dangerously premature or critically ill, having that first professional photo taken can easily fall by the wayside. It is not only not practical but not even possible to haul these infants into a studio to have their precious little faces captured for posterity. Fortunately, there is another option.

Thanks to Ryann for reminding me of an amazing organization called the American Children's Photography Charity Guild (ACPCG). Their mission is to serve as:

"A non-profit, volunteer based organization of child photographers from all over the country

who have come together to form a guild dedicated to children in need and their families."

We did not actually learn about this incredible group of photographers until we were already leaving the hospital. Ryann, and her daughter's talented photographer Nicole Green, were gracious enough to allow me to share some of the beautiful shots Nicole captured of Addyson when she weighed only 3 lb...

milies.

(I just love the sweet way Addyson is holding on tight to her parents' fingers in these shots!)

From poking around her site, I can tell you that Nicole does such a wonderful, compassionate job with these babies that many of the parents hire her to tackle those one-year shots as well! Those micropreemies sure can grow, wouldn't you say?

(Addyson at one-year-old.)

I certainly can't speak about the work of every single photographer who volunteers his or her time and talent for the ACPCG. I will, however, say that I think it's a fabulous group and I am so grateful for the spirit of giving displayed by its members.

If you or a loved one has a child who is desperately ill, I encourage you to visit the ACPCG website and search for a photographer in your area.

For more great frugal tips, please visit Frugal Friday hosted at Biblical Womanhood!

Organizing bills, applications, misc. paperwork

Ryann emailed me with this request: "One thing I'd love to see on your blog is how you keep all the medical/financial paperwork organized. I have found myself with boxes and boxes of bills, statements, benefit coverages, doctor's office receipts, handouts about vaccinations, medications, and the like."

I feel your pain! Seems like you start collecting paperwork from your first day in the hospital and it just... keeps... coming.

My method of organization is not very high-tech, but here it is. The drawer pictured above is the bottom drawer of our computer desk. It never did hold those hanging files particularly well (it seems to be slightly too wide), so I bought a whole slew of inexpensive folders. I used a black Sharpie marker to label them as shown below:


Inside, I file away informational paperwork, forms, etc. Because the fronts are clearly labeled, I can usually find what I'm looking for very quickly. The pockets keep the papers from flying around everywhere and enable me to take the file with me to appointments without things sliding out (as is prone to happen with file folders).


These are the categories you will find in my drawer:

• Complete Insurance Claims
• Apria/Pulmonary
• Adolescent Psych/Neurology
• EOB Aetna (our old insurance company)
• EOB Anthem (our current insurance)
• Developmental Peds.
• Dr. C. (my doctor- because sometimes I need a doctor too!)
• Paystubs/Tax Docs. (we have three of these- 2005, 2006, & 2007)
• Social Security
  
• Dr Z. (our pediatrician)
• Medicaid/Children's Special Health Care Services (supplementary insurance)
• Pending/Due Bills
• A- Preschool & Therapy, Age 3+
• First Steps
• To Lock In SDB (safe deposit box)- we seem to get a lot of things that need to be locked up in the months following the birth of a child- birth certificate, soc. sec. card, savings bonds, etc... happily, I can report that this folder is empty which means I'm doing my job and getting to the bank!

Your needs will vary, of course, but this break-down works for us. Periodically, I grab a folder or two while my hubby and I watch TV and I pare down, shredding anything that's no longer necessary. Because it is all separated, this task seems manageable.

The best kind of organizational system is one you can keep up with. This method may not work for everyone, but it has helped keep me sane! It works for me! For more fun tips, visit Rocks in my Dryer!

What are your tips for keeping tabs on all those pieces of paperwork?