"I Had to Separate Your Children"

They are not words I looked forward to hearing. I expected a child of mine to be older before a teacher broke the news to me:

"We had to separate your child from her peer."

I figured, eventually, maybe one of them would get in a fight. Or be bullied. Perhaps a child of mine might be too chatty or pass notes. Maybe he or she would giggle too much with a good buddy. Or they'd conspire to throw spitballs. Who knew? But it wouldn't have surprised me to learn that someday, eventually, my child would have to separated from another.

I didn't expect it to happen when she was five.

But, alas, at parent teacher conferences, we were given the news. Our little C had to be separated from her good buddy Jay.

The speech therapist is actually the one who had to do it.

Why, you might ask? Were they naughty? Were they disruptive? Did they, *gasp*, cheat?

No.

They had to separate them because...

"Jay is too nurturing to C. They've been together a long time and he just can't help but try to take care of and protect her. But she CAN do these things on her own and I want to see her have those opportunities."

Yep, our little girl can't sit by her friend because he looks out for her too much. It's really kind of precious, isn't it? You may recall that, back around her birthday, I described C. this way:

" The best way I can describe her is that she's the kind of girl that people instinctively want to look out for, to take care of..."

It is completely true. Tiny-featured, high-voiced, delicate-boned C... wherever we go, people are happy to help her.

As an infant and toddler, she wanted nothing to do with this help. Feisty and independent, she wanted to take on any and all challenges all on her own. Now? She doesn't really seem to mind taking a helping hand and, well, being doted upon.

It all makes me wonder how she'll feel when she's older. When my little girl reaches her full size (currently predicted at 5'1" and 102 lb), will she fight to stand on her own two feet or be grateful for all those willing to cherish and protect her? Will she find a happy medium?

I watch my little girl who dreams of being a princess (Correction: She actually insists she already IS a princess.) and I wonder what her future holds...

I hope there are always those who want to protect her. I hope she is always so treasured and enjoyed. Most of all, I hope she is happy and loved.

Lent '11: Letting Go of Judgment, Challenge 4

This past week's challenge was so eye opening for me... obviously, I know that I can be judgmental. That's the whole point of this Lent challenge. But when I really asked myself why I was getting my back up about others' choices, it was apparent that very few of those situations were really issues of faith or morality. I have a feeling I'm not alone in that.

Did you participate last week? Even if you didn't, I'd love to have you participate along with me at any time. As I always say, there are absolutely no rules or requirements for this Lenten journey.


Can you believe it's already time for our Week 4 Challenge? Here it is:

Initiate a conversation with a friend/neighbor/relative/fellow parishioner about a past choice you made that you now have reason to doubt. (Alternatively, you could write a post about it!) Share the learning experience.

Maybe you used to shun butter and now you see it as part of a healthy diet. Maybe you used disposable diapers with your first child and now you're a master of the cloth. ;) Perhaps you weren't a Christian and now you are. Big or small, explore the process of learning and changing. I, for one, am fairly amazed when I compare the "me" of ten years ago with the woman who stands before you today. I am a constant work in progress. I think there is value in sharing those parts of our story with others.

Will you give it a shot? Are these challenges too hard? I hope not! I hope they just take a little of your time and give you the opportunity to rethink how we view our peers and neighbors.

Please come back to see me next Wednesday so we can talk about it and get a new challenge, okay?

Button design by the spectacular Sidnie

Lent '11: Letting Go of Judgment, Challenge 3 RESULTS

Can I be honest with you all? One of the hardest things about this challenge has been realizing just how OFTEN judgmental thoughts run through my head. Ouch. It's humbling to realize what a big character flaw this is for me.

BUT... the beauty of this challenge is that it gives me a chance to constantly improve. By keeping my desire to be more open and understanding in the forefront, I'm able to often quickly dispel those initial judgmental thoughts and ideas. So here's what's going on right now...

Week 3's challenge was this:

Challenge 3: When you feel that initial knee-jerk judgment pop up after hearing/seeing/reading something that goes against YOUR grain, ask yourself: "Is this a matter of faith or morals?" If it's not, try to allow it to roll off your back.

Here's how my week went down:

Example 1:

Stood behind a lady at the check out of the grocery store. Cashier asked if she had any coupons. She remarked, "Ah, no. I choose to buy healthy food for my family and coupons are all for the junk."

My reaction: "This lady is nuts. How dare she??? I bought fresh meat, milk, vegetables, Greek yogurt and, yes, Cheerios and saved 82%. She's just ignorant or lazy."

Yikes. Not nice, I know. Defensive much? But it's true. Sigh. I grow so weary of people implying that coupon queens just buy junk. Still, that's no excuse for my judgment of HER. So, I re-framed my thoughts as I stood there.

New perspective: "We all have different priorities. I make choices that enable me to stay home with my children, but require me to save my pennies. Taking some time to clip coupons and match them up works for me. Her time might need to be spent differently and it may not be worth it to her to print and cut coupons. If our respective families' needs are being met, we are both doing just fine."

Honestly? So freeing! I don't NEED to defend what I'm doing to her!

(The bonus feature? When I saw she was buying Silk Almond Milk, I offered her an extra 75 cent off coupon I had, which doubled to $1.50 and saved her a bit. It was a non-nasty way to help illustrate how coupons can be used on "non junky" food. ;))

Example 2:

We have a new priest. Two consecutive weeks, he said, "Oh my God!" while standing before the congregation, and not as a part of worship.

My reaction: "This is not cool. This is disrespectful and inappropriate. I find this action offensive and I'm struggling to respect this man."

I stand by my reaction. To me, this IS a matter of faith and morals. I do not use that phrase and I do not allow it from my children. While I fully expect that they will hear it out in the world, I do not believe their priest should be one of the people they hear it from. Yes, he is only human, but I don't think it is too much to ask to not use our Lord's name as an interjection. I continue to struggle with this situation and I don't think it's an issue of my being too judgmental.


So there you go. A comparison of reactions I had this week. Rest assured, I experienced many more than two! But you don't need to read a novel from me. :)

Did you participate this week? I'd love to read about what happened! Link up below or tell me about it in the comments:

Peppermint Crunch Brownies

Chocolate + Mint = A Match Made in Heaven

I LOVE all things chocolate mint. So, so good. The truth, however, is that I sometimes go overboard with this combo at Christmastime and then I need a brief hiatus. It was time, though, to get back in the chocolate mint saddle!

These brownies end up with a crunchy, lacy peppermint topping that's thin enough to easily bite, but present enough to add real punch! Here's how I made these tasty beauties:

Ingredients:

• 1/2 cup (1 stick butter)
• 1 tablespoon heavy cream (or half & half, or milk,...)
• 1 cup sugar
• 1 egg, lightly beaten
• 1/2 teaspoon baking powder
• 1/2 teaspoon salt
• 1 teaspoon peppermint extract
• 1/3 cup cocoa powder
• 1 cup flour
• 12 starlight mints, crushed (This is a great kid job. They can unwrap them, dump them in a zip bag, and beat with a wooden spoon. Just make sure you check the seal!)

Directions:

Melt butter and cream together. Stir in sugar. Add egg, stirring quickly to ensure the egg does not "cook". Add baking powder, salt, and extract. Mix in cocoa powder, then add flour gradually. Pour in 8" square or 9" round pan. Top with crushed peppermints. Bake at 350 for 18 - 20 minutes. Cut with thin, sharp bladed knife for best results.

Linked to:
Tasty Tuesday
Tempt My Tummy Tuesday

Preparing For a Major Milestone

We spent our first wedding anniversary at a Baltimore Ravens game...

On our second anniversary, we watched cops chase a car thief through
our backyard (that's a story for another day)...

Sooo... our tenth anniversary is happening this year.

Guess what we're planning on doing? Anyone?

Find out and enter to win a gift pack worth $100 HERE!

Menu Plan: 3/27-Hurry Up, Spring!

Hello... Spring? Would you come back, please?? That one day you gave us two weeks ago simply wasn't enough for me! Well, in the meantime...

Here's what's hittin' our table:

Sunday:

B-Cereal, Applesauce, Milk

L-Scrambled Eggs, Tater Tots, Fruit
D-Sunday Supper at Bama & Papa's

Monday:

B-Maple Raisin Oatmeal, Milk

L-P, B, & J, Apple Slices, Water

D-Vegetable Lo Mein

Tuesday:

B-Mixed Berry Muffins, Oranges, Milk
L-Parmesan Noodles w/ Carrots, Juice
D-Tater Tot Casserole

Wednesday:

B-Mixed Berry Muffins, Yogurt, Juice

L-PB Raisin Smiley Toasts, Apples, Water
D-Chicken and Black Bean Quesadillas, Corn

Thursday:

B-PB Toast, Oranges, Milk

L-Egg & Cheese Burritos, Berries, Water

D-Chicken Noodle Soup w/ extra carrots, Cinnamon Rolls

Friday:

B-Smoothies, Toast

L-Cheesy Beans & Rice, Water

D-Garlic, Shrimp, & Broccoli White Pizza* (subbing shrimp for chicken)

Saturday:

B-Yogurt Muffins, Sausage Links, Fruit

L-Ramen Noodles w/ Cheese, Fruit
D-Carnitas Soft Tacos

*All pizzas on our menu plans from now until Easter will be MEATLESS in keeping with our Catholic tradition.

I was SO proud of myself for having NEXT month's four weeks of menu plans all made up, oh, almost three weeks ago. BUT... the danger of that? I've scored some fantastic deals on "other things" over the past couple weeks and I'll be doing some tweaking. But that's okay! That's all part of the process.

How about you? Do you adjust your menu plan based in part on the deals you find?

This post is linked to Menu Plan Menu.

Progress for the Unborn

Fridays are so wonderful, are they not?

Not only is the weekend knocking at our door, it's also the day Amy hosts Finer Things Friday. I LOVE a post (and all those linked up!) that celebrates the simple joys of life.

This week? Well, my kids are still cute, my recipes still yummy, and Spring still very welcome. ;) But...

The finest thing I can think of to celebrate today?

A Wave of Anti Abortion Bills Advance in the States

What does this mean? Well, here are just a few things:

• In a number of states, lawmakers are considering bills that would ban elective abortions after 20 or 21 weeks of pregnancy.
• In Ohio, there's been a hearing on an even tougher measure that would outlaw abortions after the first medically detectable heartbeat - as early as six weeks into a pregnancy.
• In Texas, a bill passed by the House would require that pregnant women have an opportunity to view a sonogram image, hear the fetal heartbeat and listen to a doctor describe the fetus.
• In more than 20 states, bills have been introduced to restrict insurance coverage of abortion.
• In Virginia... lawmakers last month passed a bill requiring abortion clinics to be regulated on the same basis as hospitals. Abortion-rights group said this could entail higher costs and force several clinics to close.

For me, and many other pro lifers, this is, of course, nowhere near enough.

But it IS progress.

And THAT, my friends, is a finer thing, indeed.