Yesterday, I followed a link from my BlogHer sidebar over there on the right for an article entitled "Should Bars Refuse to Serve Pregnant Women?"
I really should have known better. Somehow I guess I thought that at least most of the commenters would share my opinion which, for the record, is...
"Um, NO. Absolutely not. They should NOT serve pregnant women."
I was wrong.
Turns out most of the comments centered around how refusing to serve a pregnant woman is sexist. That's it's prejudice against women. That it's a gender-issue and, after all, these are grown women who have a right to do what they want! No one could tell a man he couldn't drink because pregnancy is a uniquely "female" issue. Over and over, women insisted that we can not and should not put the well-being of a mere fetus over the choices of a grown woman who is already on this earth and, thus, is entitled to more rights than some little bunch of cells.
When did we women become so short-sighted that we can't see beyond our "rights to do what we want when we want"? When did we decide that having a glass of wine now is more important and more empowering than being the ones to bring life- life- into this world?
I just don't understand why someone would choose to bring a little life into the world if she doesn't want to take care of it. I don't think I'm being punished by being the one who carries our babies. I don't think my husband is oh-so-much luckier to not have a child within him. I am so blessed to have that honor and responsibility. I've never once felt "put out" by having a life growing inside of me... even when it meant enduring caffeine withdrawal headaches when I foolishly went cold-turkey with my first.
I realize, yes, that there are different opinions on how much (if any) alcohol is safe during pregnancy. There's no general consensus on that one other than the fact that "too much" is bad. Doesn't it make sense for a bar or restaurant to ere on the side of caution? If my five year old grabbed a beer and took a swig, it's unlikely to do any real harm. Does that make it right or something I should encourage? Of course not. It's too hard to determine "how much is safe" and that's part of why we just don't serve alcohol to children... and I think the unborn variety should be included in that.
Back when I was a waitress, I refused to serve a pregnant woman the glass of white zinfandel that she ordered. I have no regrets about that.
But, apparently, I'm in the minority with my views. I was shocked, to be honest. And maybe that's because I have a feeling many, if not most, of my readers might agree with me...
So... do you?