Thursday, January 6, 2011

Resolved: To Be Happy With My Family and Friends

My family is not perfect.

Does that shock anyone? Probably not. That's actually easy to say. But try this on for size...

My family is deeply flawed.

Ouch. That one hurts a little more. And probably is a bit more uncomfortable to read, too.

But it's true. That's the pure truth, ripped free, and thrust out into the light.

My family is deeply flawed.

This should come as no surprise since I, myself, am littered with flaws and dark spots, with failures and shortcomings. I fall, over and over again, and stumble blindly at times as I traipse through the muck of my own humanity.

There are topics that cause great debate between my husband and myself- issues that are hard to talk about and can result in icy silence (him) and slamming cabinets (me).

There have been times when I have gone far too long without speaking to family members over issues that- while seemingly insurmountable at the time- ultimately turned out to be insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

There are things out there- in our past, our present, and likely our future- that I'm not totally proud of.

And all of that- the whole kit and kaboodle- ALL OF IT is okay.

I'm not going to rip open my whole life and pour all the gory details out there. That wouldn't be helpful to you or me.

What I want you to know is this:

Do not feel like you should ever be comparing your reality to the shiny bits and pieces of mine that you find here. And I will not compare mine to yours.

Don't get me wrong- those shiny bits? All true. I have a good life- a great family- and lots and lots of happy times. The bright moments are big and bold enough to, if not eliminate, at least distract from the dark spots and dim corners.

But they are there. And so... if you have a couple dark spots here and there... if tears sometimes take the place of laughter and your lips tremble rather than grin...

Know that you're still healthy. You're just human. And it doesn't mean you're not happy.

I am resolved... to be content with all the many dimensions of my relationships with family and friends.

And to dance in the light while accepting the shadows.

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