Thursday, February 26, 2009

13 Ways I'm (Maybe) An Overprotective Mommy

I titled this (maybe) overprotective because, well, I think I'm very reasonable! But here are thirteen reasons I've been accused of being overprotective in the past... (And for those who might not know, I have a 4-year old, a 3-year old, and I'm pregnant with our third.)
  1. I skip over anything even remotely scary on movies... and I'm talking Disney movies here.
  2. I don't let my kids ride on 4-wheelers with their uncle.
  3. I don't let my kids drink soda.
  4. I expect my kids to wear shoes when they go outside. (except on the beach)
  5. I still cut my 4-year old's grapes in half.
  6. I threw a huge fit when someone suggested my 25 lb but not yet 1-year old baby could be turned forward-facing.
  7. I don't let my kids ride on riding mowers... even with grandparents.
  8. I still water down my kids' juice.
  9. I don't let my kids chew gum.
  10. My gigantic 4-year old son is still in a 5-pt harness car seat and I like it that way.
  11. I really like cribs and bed-rails for as long as possible.
  12. I also really prefer skid-proof socks.
  13. I don't let my kids watch any network or cable TV, play hand-held video games, or do anything on the internet.

Do I seem unreasonable to you?
What Mommy-decisions have made people call you "overprotective"?
I'd love to hear!
For more Thursday {Thirteen}, be sure to visit Happy to Be at Home.


Kate said...

I do so many of these things too, and the others I don't do only because my husband won't let me! :)

By the way, I still cut grapes into 1/4s! I could probably get away with halves now.

Jennifer said...

My kids aren't allowed to chew gum until they are 5. I keep them in 5 point harnesses until they are 5, my older 2 until they were 6, or longer if they won't stay correctly in the booster. I do not hesitate to put them back in a real car seat. Grapes make me nervous and if my kids didn't throw a fit, I would still cut them up too. Over protective can be a good think ya know?

Anonymous said...

I'm the same way with a lot of those, so don't feel bad!

To add to it, I won't let my kids stay with anyone unless I absolutely KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt I can trust them. There are no gray areas for me, lol.

Sherry said...

There is nothing wrong with being overprotective nowdays. Too many scary things! My children were only allowed to go to their grandparents to stay the night for the longest time. I think my daughter was 9 before I let her sleep at a friend's house that I knew was ok. Love your 13!

Have a great Thursday!

Sarah said...

I am so glad I found your blog! I think it might just stem from having a preemie. Our daughter was born at St. V's in Indy in 2003 at 25 weeks. She only lived for 9 days but I guess the feeling of thinking you could have done more sticks with you. With our son and our twins (who were born at 33 weeks..big difference from 25, right?) I feel like I can never be too cautious. And besides, our oldest is almost 4 and I've never let him have soda or gum, I just don't think a kid that young needs it!

Anonymous said...

This sounds like a loving mommy to me. I'm the same way and my MIL have had a number of arguments about it. Recently I explained it to her like this, and she is seeing my side a little more clearly:

They're only young and innocent once, so let them stay young and innocent as long as possible (no PG rated movies and no commercials for my 3 year old, for example.) He isn't going to be harmed for not having seen some TV show with a bad-attitude kid who back talks and does stupid things, and sugar cereal commercials.

And it's my job to help them learn to make healthy choices and protect them from harm. (So they don't get fast food, soda, or anything with high fructose corn syrup.)

My 3 year old does play Wii golf, bowling, and baseball with my husband, so there are video games, but they're active and not violent in the least. (He can't play boxing on the same system!)

I am strict about toys, too. No licensed toys, no weapons, and no mindless toys. If it makes noise or moves, it's because he's interacting with it (like a xylophone) not because he's pushing a button. Blocks, crayons, and well written books (not the kind that read to you!) are learning toys. If it can't be played with without batteries it doesn't have a place in our toybox.

Yeah, I'm overprotective too!

Heather Benza said...

These things seem like normal things that every parent should do. I didn't consider myself overprotective--I thought everyone else was taking for granted the health and safety of their child just like they took for granted a healthy pregnancy, delivery, newborn----so are you saying really it's me, I'm one of THOSE moms?!

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JessieLeigh said...

So glad to see that so many of you do similar things!

Kate- I cut grapes in quarters sometimes still... halves are for my "daring days" ;)

Jennifer- Good for you on the car seat safety!

christinnjon & Sherry- Oh my goodness, I don't want to THINK of my kids staying with anyone other than family! Something else to worry about!

Sarah- Preemie moms are a bit of a different breed in some ways. :) The difference between 25 and 33 weeks is profound, no doubt. So sorry to hear about your daughter-- our girl was a Riley baby but St. V's is a good hospital too... you must be too far from me!

happylittlehouse- I completely agree and think you did a great job of explaining it... I should have let you write my post! ;)

Heather- You crack me up. I, of course, do not think you're one of "THOSE moms"... I think it's just making good judgements! But I know opinions differ and I'm sure there are many others out there thinking that I'm depriving my kids of "learning opportunities" and "important experiences"! :)

Mellodee said...

Protective? yes, Overprotective? no

At least not right now. If you are still doing these (or similar things) when they are 10 or 12....well, that's another story!

You have to do what feels right for you and YOUR kids.

There is, however, merit in the point of view that kids do need "learning opportunities" and "important experiences" but, as with nearly everything, moderation and reason and common sense will allow the parent to know when to let go a bit and give them the freedom and encouragement to learn. Just know that no matter how hard you try, NO ONE can protect their children from EVERY possible bad thing that could happen! Something will sneak through....but that is the process called life and each child must build the skills needed to navigate through life too.

Nobody ever said parenting was easy, but we all learn as we go. The key relates to building a safe environment and providing the appropriate guidance at every age. You do the best you can. And love them through every single moment of every single day!